shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
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