Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
