i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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