You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
