so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize