haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
