No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Blood and glitter go together right?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
