After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Randomize
