so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
