well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
