We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize