Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
