so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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