hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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