One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
He felt like a one man threesome
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
