does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
