I smell stomach acid.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Someone signed my nipple.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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