He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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