i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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