You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
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And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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