I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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