He is such a slut. More and more my type.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
