In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
