Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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