they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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