If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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