The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
