omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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