Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
you had me at cake vodka
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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