he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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