I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
porn star boner night. come get it.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
