I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
