Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
