Having a random hookup so left but love u
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
In America we eat man semen.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
