just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
