Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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