I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
