It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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