Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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