You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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