soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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