Quick, to the slutcave!
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Randomize
