We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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