Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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