I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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