After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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