I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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