I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
