The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I yelled at your uterus for you.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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