I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize