I smell stomach acid.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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