you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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